Vegas Vacation 3: Omnimaxxx − 14 May, 1999
Yes, we slept in. Again. It's a vacation; you're supposed to relax.
We decided to do something different today, so we walked over to the old strip (Fremont Street). In an effort to lure more tourists and their gambling dollars to the old strip, they recently made it a pedestrian mall and covered it over with a canopy. The canopy was covered in multi-colored lights, and at night they were used to put on cartoonish, animation "shows."
After having lunch in a little cafe, we spent the better part of the day ducking in and out of the casinos. My wife spent four hours and $40 on a nickel slot machine. She didn't change machines once.
The rest of us played a few slots and then tried our luck at the blackjack tables.
Whoever said blackjack has the best odds for winning of all the games in Vegas is a fucking moron. Maybe they're right, but I lost the more money at those damn tables than anywhere else.
We hung around long enough for the sun to go down so we could watch the light show on the canopy.
Meh.
By this time we -- how can I put this delicately -- needed a break from each other. So, my brother-in-law and his wife left for parts unknown, and my wife and I went back to wandering around the newer casinos.
A few hours of wandering went by before we came to the conclusion that we had had our fill. So now what?
At this point, we were in Caeser's Palace. My wife noticed a sign advertising a movie -- "Wildfire" -- at the Omnimax theater there. What the hell? At least it would give our feet a rest.
We purchased our tickets, and upon entering the theater we realized we had almost definitely made a mistake. The theater stank like it hadn't been cleaned in years. The "dome" looked like it had coffee stains all over it. And, of course, the floor was stickier than flypaper.
I actually found it a bit odd the floor would be sticky, since they didn't allow food or drinks in the theater. Then I looked around at the few other people that were there. Apparently it's cheaper for prostitutes to get a ticket for the Omnimax than to rent a room for an hour. Great, we're watching a movie in a whorehouse.
To top it off, the movie sucked ass. It was a documentary, and an excruciatingly bad one, at that. No, we didn't stay for the entire movie. Though, if we had, we probably would have seen a number of burlesque side-shows.
It was time to throw in the towel for the night, so we headed back to our room. When we got there, my brother-in-law and his wife were already in bed asleep. And the room looked quite disheveled. It seems they came back to the room extra early for some wild monkey sex.
Crap. Why the hell didn't we think of that?
We decided to do something different today, so we walked over to the old strip (Fremont Street). In an effort to lure more tourists and their gambling dollars to the old strip, they recently made it a pedestrian mall and covered it over with a canopy. The canopy was covered in multi-colored lights, and at night they were used to put on cartoonish, animation "shows."
After having lunch in a little cafe, we spent the better part of the day ducking in and out of the casinos. My wife spent four hours and $40 on a nickel slot machine. She didn't change machines once.
The rest of us played a few slots and then tried our luck at the blackjack tables.
Whoever said blackjack has the best odds for winning of all the games in Vegas is a fucking moron. Maybe they're right, but I lost the more money at those damn tables than anywhere else.
We hung around long enough for the sun to go down so we could watch the light show on the canopy.
Meh.
By this time we -- how can I put this delicately -- needed a break from each other. So, my brother-in-law and his wife left for parts unknown, and my wife and I went back to wandering around the newer casinos.
A few hours of wandering went by before we came to the conclusion that we had had our fill. So now what?
At this point, we were in Caeser's Palace. My wife noticed a sign advertising a movie -- "Wildfire" -- at the Omnimax theater there. What the hell? At least it would give our feet a rest.
We purchased our tickets, and upon entering the theater we realized we had almost definitely made a mistake. The theater stank like it hadn't been cleaned in years. The "dome" looked like it had coffee stains all over it. And, of course, the floor was stickier than flypaper.
I actually found it a bit odd the floor would be sticky, since they didn't allow food or drinks in the theater. Then I looked around at the few other people that were there. Apparently it's cheaper for prostitutes to get a ticket for the Omnimax than to rent a room for an hour. Great, we're watching a movie in a whorehouse.
To top it off, the movie sucked ass. It was a documentary, and an excruciatingly bad one, at that. No, we didn't stay for the entire movie. Though, if we had, we probably would have seen a number of burlesque side-shows.
It was time to throw in the towel for the night, so we headed back to our room. When we got there, my brother-in-law and his wife were already in bed asleep. And the room looked quite disheveled. It seems they came back to the room extra early for some wild monkey sex.
Crap. Why the hell didn't we think of that?
on fremont street
Comments:
kga245 (May 5, 2008. 11:06pm)
Drat. You never think of monkey sex when you it most!