The freckles in our eyes are mirror images and when we kiss they're perfectly aligned.  − 27 January, 2006

Just the night before I went on a date with Andy, a guy I was completely uninterested in.  Somehow, the dates had continued till this point. But that night, I decided to patch things up with a friend of mine, Robbie, who I knew liked me.  We had talked on the phone for months and I had just come to the realization that I felt the same way. This should have told me to stay away, since I hadn’t officially cut things off with the first guy. On this night, as I always have done, I got myself into a mess.

I drove with Robbie through town, and we had a good time. We joked and flirted, but I didn’t expect anything to come out of it. That night when we went back to get his Mercury, we decided to not quite end the night there.

It was very awkward, and too hot. Even in January we were both sweating. We somehow got very flirty, and the awkwardness grew. Being the move-maker I have grown to be, I decided to get a little closer. I moved my head to his shoulder, knowing this was not a move I should be making.  He looked down at me, scared, and up at him, too confident for my own good. He moved his head in closer, and whispered, “we really shouldn’t, do this, what about Andy?” At this point, Andy did not exist.

Even though I wasn’t really worried about it, I told him he was right, this was a bad idea, all while circling my mouth towards him.  Our “we really shouldn’t, we need to stop” turned into a fumbling mess of sweet saliva and reaching hands. At one point, I opened my eyes to see myself almost over the console, and was almost too embarrassed to keep kissing. Almost.  

Another hour of beautiful submergence later, we pull away, both late for curfew. We’re almost panting as we wipe our mouths.  Looking around, we see windows so fogged you’d think we had been in there for days. We laughed at ourselves, almost embarrassed.  We said our goodbyes, and I watched him drive away, amazed that just kissing could blow me away so forcefully.

His kisses still shock me every time.